The First 100 Days of Exorcising Demons With ID!
All in 100 days of work! The “Exorcising Demons With ID” page will continue the journey, just not be as long to scroll through. The stand-alone age will be updated daily, as usual, stank sweat-free!
Day 1
Here she is
Coming in at 218 pounds
The Tower of Terror,
The Commotion In The Ocean,
Maaaaaaaaandry Hollandaze!
I’m a big girl. A bigger girl than I think I am in my mind. I have always had an enormous ass that I know on anyone, and I’m not looking for competition.
I don’t twerk, but I can do squats all damn day. And that’s what this daily diary is for. I have been doing routines on and off due to the usual list of bullshit you can make up not to exercise. So I felt, to be fair to myself and stay accountable, I will be putting it all out there for all to see the work I have done to keep this little sprite tight for me, myself, and I.
Although this is day one, it is also the last day I won’t be doing any excising- I took a week-long break after getting a sinus cold, and my body needed sleep.
Enjoy my “before” glam shots in the suit that I feel like a Caribbean queen. I have another wardrobe in mind that will be my “after” photo.
Day 2
My current workout routine is the laziest I have ever adopted since I began doing anything close to being perceived as physical fitness. I’m not one of those gym rats who’ll spend up to 3 hours in the gym just doing gym shit to smell like the gym after using showers and gym saunas. I like the gym, but you fuckin stink! I’ve been working out at home. It’s not as bad. I have to fight for room to do certain things, but I get it done.
This day is an off day to the 5-day calendar schedule that I’m doing now. It’s been two months, and this previous week was my first break. I never look forward to stopping because it makes me not miss it in the slightest. I have no real goal; if I work toward one thing, I’m pushing for another. So this journey is all over the place in my mind. I’m at a crossroads between wanting to go further in Jiu-Jitsu and Karate- when I’ve had some lessons on the basics through an extensive exercise program that I took six times. For now, I’m conditioning, toning, and stretching more than I have in the past, with still more training to go.
Day 3
I am never pumped up to work out.
When I get in that motion, I’m in it. There is an absurd amount of time wasted all before that happens. I am sitting in one place, ogling the thirst traps on Instagram and wondering if I should take a nap or try accounting again. For someone who’s been physically in one place for 35 years, my mind has frequent flyer miles to take me to the moon and back.
I went to my workout folder to see what I should begin to do today, and it turns out I had taken care of all that a while ago and had forgotten about it. Last month, leg work and yoga movements worked on my hips.
Now it will be all abs and the continuation of legs, possibly stepping it up a notch, for the next twenty-two days.
Day 4
I’m full of shit. Then again, aren’t we all?
Getting used to a routine is something I have no issues with; it’s time that is never on my side.
I mentioned the shortest program I’ve done, and I am having a hard time with it. Hard because I want to do more in more time. Reflecting on when I had that time and what I did to get the desired result will take more sacrifice than I’m willing to part with.
Writing is a significant part of my daily life and the tasks for all eternity. Unfortunately, I also have this body for all eternity, so I need to stop bullshitting myself and step up my game. I have no end-goal date. Those are only for movies; to prove to someone that you’re a bigger piece of shit than they are.
Enough shit talk. I have another AMRAP of abs- those are burpees, tuck ups, plank walkout, reach thrust and seated leg lifts, and two rounds of 5 leg movements involving wall sit, side plank leg lifts, frog glute bridge, squat pulses, and good mornings.
Yesterday was a good start; 20 more days to go until I move on again.
Day 5
Poophoria.
This was a word that generated into my head after taking a fantastic shit. I could not believe that it was real and had a definition to go along with it. ‘Poophoria’ or a ‘stool high’ is the experience of passing a large stool that can feel like an orgasm. … The Mirror said, quoting from the book, when the movement is big enough to distend the rectum, it can stimulate the vagus nerve, usually associated with having an orgasm.
I didn’t have an orgasm. It was more euphoric than orgasmic. My immediate urge afterward was to write “Girls” fanfiction. But I didn’t. Having that thought associated with the experience led me to believe I would write something better than the entire series, and I could not release that power at that time.
Today, as I dropped my actual kids off at school, I thought back to the hour previous and how I didn’t want to get up at all. Including not wanting to exercise, but I know I can’t let that happen unless I’m out for the count.
Tomorrow I have a rest from the rotating planks, sit-up slides, crossbody mountain climbers, candlestick to sit-ups, and lastly, arabesques until I pass out. Oh, what fun.
Day 6
It’s bittersweet to have a day off exercising during the winter. This weekend is due for the usual heavy white shit to fall, and I have to shovel it. Honestly, I look forward to the arm and ab work. I know how to save my back from the pain I’ve experienced in the past, and listening to songs I can sing and no one will hear is a plus in my book.
Returning to all the jumps, the holds, concentrating on parts that aren’t paid much attention to makes me want to do more than I can’t handle right now. The pain in the gain is what I’m craving in this practice, and the practice is what my body wants to preach. And I want you all in the front row of my sermon.
Day 7
After taking an extended nap this afternoon, my sweaty adventures will be done in the evening today. It hasn’t stopped snowing, leaving that task for later to tackle.
Two rounds of flutter kicks, planche presses, tap crunches, hollow arch rolls, and floor thrusters with push-ups sound so much fun compared to the single-leg deadlifts, side plank leg circles, seat straddled leg lifts, and useless fucking curtsy lunges in as many reps as possible. This is one of those half-ass days when sleep makes the most sense.
Day 8
Yesterday turned out to be a partial free-for-all due to my lack of floor space. I’ve realized now, more so than ever, that I need to step up my ab exercises game. My diet has a lot to say about my progress, so I’ll get into that mess soon enough. It’s more of a physiological issue that I’m still navigating.
It’s disturbing sometimes how detached I am mentally from my physical self. I’ve just attained two bathing suits that I know I will look fine as fuck in, and it’s when I’m naked is when I realize I have so much more to go. I’m not devastated by this realization every time. It becomes a “Sure Jan” moment that I laugh at and then do what I got to do to get there.
I know it won’t take much, so today is a bit of a fast warm-up into a three ab movement AMRAP, then a ten-minute AMRAP of inner thigh lift, narrow stance squats, and curtsy to pile for legs. My urge to go longer with deeper movements is rising steadily. Like any wise person, I don’t want to hurt myself, and pain takes me out of the game longer than I want to be.
Day 9
Rest day. It didn’t feel like one.
We took the boys to the kid casino and got them Pizza Hut. It was a bit of a long day but nothing out of the ordinary. I thought about the work I did yesterday and look forward to beginning the new week.
I’ve considered restarting my consumption of supplements that give me the illusion of progress. I can’t be certain for sure, but I think they did do some things for me in the positive. Aside from being an unconscious investment, I wouldn’t say I like taking so many pills that only work in the short term. I know fat cannot and will never go away by taking pills; that is awful to project on desperate people.
For now, I am sticking to lemon and olive oil and three to four liters of water. It sucks, but it’s not doing any hidden damage.
Day 10
Way to eat my fucking words with pills! I broke down. Now I’ll get some assistance with supplements that I should be taking to match my physical activity.
I’ll take this time now to lay out what I consume for sustenance and what I’ve done successfully in the past to bring me to a not-so-large stature.
It began with Almased; you’ve heard of it. The yellow powder that’s been around in stores probably for decades gives you the promise of shedding the pounds in days. And you do, by legitimately starving yourself. The catch was consuming the amount of protein your body would need not be hungry. At Thirty dollars a pop and only ten servings in the package, the ratio was ridiculous. The impossibility of keeping up with purchasing but being satisfied that I was getting where I needed to be had me searching for something a little less expensive.
While on that journey to find the current protein supplement, I didn’t go through many to settle on Garden of Life Raw Organic Meal Replacement Shakes, chocolate flavor, of course. Although it has less protein in each serving, I blend it with protein milk that I can consume, giving me 50g or more each meal and a true feeling of being satisfied without wanting to stuff my face full of food an hour later.
But what about actual food?
That’s a tricky one. I try my best to feed them healthy as hell food with two boys, and I do. But sometimes, there isn’t a lot to go around, so I make sure they eat first and foremost. I’m not a fan of constantly giving sugary shit to them, but they do have treats. Fruits are consumed daily, and vegetables are always served with dinner. Not many fried foods or any at all are made; freshly made pork, chicken, beef, or when in season, lamb is always on the menu. I cook like a motherfucker. But sometimes I can’t even eat my food. Aside from my shakes, my caloric intake is all out of whack. I have to be force-fed.
But I don’t have to be forced to exorcise my demons.
Today will be a repeat of one of the days past, with one added extra movement for a challenge.
Day 11
It is unbelievably hard to drink water. You can lead this horse to water, but you can’t force me to drink.
I’m not hip on drinking electrolyte-packed colored bullshit because although the twists, jumps, and holds do loosen your shit up, the artificial sugar element is disgusting to me. I’m not entirely against it, but it’s not something I drink compared to my work. Water will always be my go-to, even with the higher intensity routines I’ve practiced.
But I do cheat, somewhat. You have to add some flavor to savor H2O, so it doesn’t taste like purified saliva. When taken in moderation, hydration multipliers with additives are the best way to feel refreshed and good overall.
I don’t know how refreshed I’ll be with two rounds of rotating side planks, sit-up slides, candlestick to sit-ups, crossbody mountain climbers, and kicking my legs backward to tighten the most enormous ass known to humankind.
Day 12
Yesterday was as hard as I wanted it to be.
Aside from slipping on ice and landing on my palms, my forearms are sore with every part of my body that should be sore from work. During my last doctor’s visit, I joked with her saying that the best time to work on your summer body is during the winter. It’s an ingenious way to show off all the pain, gains, and time you took to be unavailable to anyone ever again.
I’m looking good for me. No one else.
Today, a rare delight. I look forward to flutter kicks, planche pressing, tap crunches, floor thrusters with push-ups, hollow holds, and a leg AMRAP routine that makes me look forward to tomorrow’s rest day.
Day 13
Rest day.
While doing single-leg deadlifts, I remembered tips from a previous routine that helped me keep my balance better and exert power in the movement. It won’t be long until I cave and begin more extreme. Now I’m beginning to feel what I’m supposed to. Then again it could have been from me slipping on ice the other day. I’m not old! You are!
Day 14
It’s so strange how you tend to limit yourself to a constrained model that you fear breaking.
I kept telling myself that I wouldn’t start mixed martial arts and kickboxing training until I finished my very minimal five-day workout because I won’t have any rest days.
I could still take the rest days. I need it!
I’m a dingus.
I got to tell ya; I had to take breaks. I thought I was ok with my breathing, and I wasn’t winded, just fat girl out of breath from doing a fuck ton of jumping around. There is progress to make in a big way in that department.
It’s going to get crazy.
Day 15
I went forward and continued with what proceeded MMA Speed in Core De Force called Dynamic Strength, a test of your overall fitness. I’ve done the movements in this routine countless times, but if your body isn’t in the habit of doing them on command, you feel it. And today, I fucking felt it.
The previous night did leave me in a state of not wanting to do anything at all; I binged about nine movies throughout the day. Not much sitting was done, and I was my usual active self.
I can feel pain where it should be, and noted while performing the moves in Dynamic Strength that I’m slipping! I am not running toward any particular finish line, and I know I’ll get the results I want when the time comes.
Day 16
Rest day.
The human body is something else. I’ve been belching and farting so much when I don’t even drink carbonated drinks or eat gassy foods. A squishy receptacle of vapors and waste.
My body aches in a good way today. I’ll massage some of them out. I’m looking forward to tomorrow.
Day 17
I seriously forgot my love/hate relationship with sweating.
One moment I want to cocoon myself in saran wrap and olive oil so I can sweat the fat out of my pores, and at the same time, I never want to know what the feeling of moist is ever again in my life. I’ll get to that point when menopause sets in, but those juices can flow for now.
I remember a while back; I purchased these super-maxi headbands to use during my bike workouts. They were a bandaid on a cracked dam to the buckets I was spilling. The moral of the story is, be stink. Sweat everywhere. Smell like a dead raccoon’s pussy flame-broiled by the molten lava squeezed out of your pores from sweating so fucking much.
Because you’re gonna be so fucking hot when you’re done that you’re gonna have to be funky as fuck to get them away from you.
Just a suggestion.
I had a good workout after a day’s rest.
Day 18
The get-up and go attitude has been my mornings as of late.
Once I am warmed up, I get to hopping around, doing push-ups, staring blankly into nothing, squats, and dancey dances to round off my scheduled 30-minute workout legally named Power Sculpt.
The urge to add my bike into my workout is getting stronger. I’ll keep rolling, rolling, rolling.
Day 19
I fucked up.
I knew something like this would happen because I have a weak constitution, and I do what pleases me. I haven’t been very pleased for the past nine months, possibly for 15 years.
Either way, I didn’t help myself the best way yesterday, making today’s workout hard to get through. I completed it with routines that were not difficult to achieve, but I had to take my time or not put too much power into it to make it unpleasant.
I’m satisfied with how I performed. I will need to do better next time.
Day 20
Rest day.
When a rest from exorcising approaches, I don’t feel that it is really a day of rest. It’s an impossible task to achieve in a demanding lifestyle. Being unable to detach from everyday life is not rest. Not challenging your body’s weight against itself isn’t rest. Knowing in 24 hours only new tasks will replace the old ones is not rest. Rest doesn’t come without sacrifice.
There is no rest for the wicked.
Day 21
Pretty sneaky.
There was a part of my past that I hadn’t visited in a very long time; weightlifting. However, I want to improve my body weight routines; lifting weights assists in the process. The movements were great, and I look forward to mixing them back up in the effort of exorcising my demons.
My quadriceps need the most work, along with my hips. Opened, wide.
Day 22
It took time to slow things down and actively stretch.
That is always a good time. Slowing down a technique to improve on it later while adding speed is the best way to be confident you’ll only bruise rather than break something. Punching air is cute, but having resistance in front of that punch would improve my muscle memory not to hit people in the face. I’ll beat your ass, literally, but I won’t touch your money maker.
But all in self-defense seriousness, I have always had a defensive demeanor, and I don’t live in an area where waiting for help is an option. Things can change instantly with or without using my hands, and I believe that this won’t be as easy as it was before I plateaued.
I need this to be hard.
Day 23
It is cold as fuck today.
Resting consisted of crying and sorting out various papers to be scanned and shredded like how I’ll be soon. When you’ve got your life laid out before you within dated documents of past accomplishments, how are you sure you were on the right path when the only easy task you’ve performed was to keep pushing when it matters to someone else? Am I doing this all for me?
No. Only part of it.
If it weren’t for the reminders that turn Eleven and Six this year, I literally would not be here. I wasn’t named Bugs for anything.
Day 24
A typical day of getting shredded, swinging my way into the day with zero effort added from the day before.
Afterward, I incorporated meditative movements for the first time that helped me loosen up and continue to cool down from the intensity I performed earlier.
Everything is off to a good start considering it’s been only a week and I feel like I will keep going at this pace until I attain more time to improve. All in good time.
Day 25
I got off to a very late start today.
Nonetheless, it got done. To be honest, I wasn’t focused. Mildy distracted but functional. I feel a tremendous change in parts of my parts.
Soon, I will show off a new exercise that I’ll do for a short amount of time on my off days.
Day 26
Today was great.
I was reminded that stretching and attempting perform massages on myself puts me in other compromising positions where I would need more massages. I’m not saying that rubbing cream on my ass is an inconvenience but should be a shared task. As The Fixx said, “one thing leads to another” and to get those bone-crushing thighs I need to pay more attention to my knees, so not I have to get those strengthened too.
One thing always leads to another.
Day 27
Rest day.
What I considered to be rest was to walk 5 miles and push a 50-pound half-broken shopping cart full of food home before picking my kids up from school. I was already in pain in parts of my body that didn’t render me useless to the tasks I needed to complete.
I do see some progress, but these damn knees are catching up with me, and all the unpadded times I was on them.
It was a great walk and am used to taking long strolls just to pass the time peacefully. It’s a pastime I don’t ever wish to give up.
Day 28
I alternated showing how dynamic my strength is and just lifted weights. There was a time when I loved that routine and even worked my way up to lifting 90 pounds in addition to my body weight. I slacked off because I did not want to get too swole. I don’t mind that physic on anyone else, I don’t want to take it to the point where none of my shirts fit me anymore, and I have a fuck ton of shirts!
Performing 8×8 combinations focuses on more minor things that I have to pay attention to when kickboxing. When technics are slowed down, I can put that power where it needs to be along with the speed of the movement.
I know where I’m going, do you?
Day 29
I actively recovered from my mistakes and took the proper time to stretch everything out the way it should be.
The hardest part for me is to relax. Sometimes I feel like that’s not even possible. A body that is in motion stays in motion. It gathers the debris of outer elements, building up until those things you ignored finally catch up with you.
I’m curious about hyperbolic stretching. Like everything else, it has to be done daily for results. I need a stretching partner to keep me accountable in that department. I can do all the kicks and punches just fine.
I need a wrangler to control this ass of mine.
Day 30
Rest day.
To celebrate this day of zero fucks, I spent the day with a perfect friend of mine, where my mind was free, and I didn’t have to feel like a piece of shit for being myself.
I haven’t had that in 10 years. 21st-century slavery is alive and kicking within the minds know nothing else but control.
The rest felt good. Now, back to the show.
Day 31
After my actual day of rest, I have to take another because it is late in the day and the long commute I endured today.
I am looking very forward to returning to it all tomorrow, with feeling.
Day 32
Recovering and slowing things down was the ticket to today. I know that sacrifices were made for the cause. I need to sweat more; I need to go a little harder than I am now, and I know I will in time.
For now, I’ll slow things down while I push things to the point.
Day 33
I woke up today and chose violence.
To shake things up and get the juices flowing,, I performed the moves in Grab Bag Power, a routine that I was unfamiliar with and liked not knowing what was next. Since I don’t have sandbags, I rotated between my 10lb and 20lb dumbells. Squats, deadlifts, lunges, and crap on my back that I genuinely enjoyed. All of which produced a mason jar of sweat that will never be for sale.
The combination of strength, cardio, bodyweight training, athletic training is what I’m after. This is what I wanted, and I’m ready to play.
Day 34
Rest day.
The last couple of days has been a mixture of tumultuous frenzied thoughts and actions that lead to guilt from the procrastination of tasks that I could easily do without being asked twice. With my boys on vacation and the weather going through menopause, the only option is to be indoors in an already cramped space with not one moment to think clearly. I avoid sleep to perform a task that isn’t of a demand to find a car that I don’t care about the whereabouts of. It debilitates the nerves.
Although my list is short, they take up a considerable amount of time until I notice the clock strikes six, and it’s time to make dinner.
I don’t live alone. I have the father of my children here, but I feel like I’m raising three kids rather than the two I physically gave birth to. I complain too much about the things I can’t change and need to focus on what I can here.
Play harder tomorrow.
Day 35
Today was a good workout day.
I didn’t feel entirely like crap while performing. My knee and hamstrings still have some soreness, but I fixed that with some hip stretches. Those movements I need advancement on. I can’t even compare the tightness to anything. In general, I’m already a tense person, so my muscles are me, tight as fuck.
I envision myself dry humping the floor, also known as frog pose, for a considerable amount of time until some things eased out not to make me feel like a stale human pretzel. I would be so obliged if I had a supportive spotter to help stretch open my hips that would make JCVD proud. The position is only open to former Marines interested in Cryptozoology, like dogs, and whose name begins with “Z.” A concise list, a fantastical standard to meet, but we can all dream.
Day 36
The Mid-Winter recess my kids had is now over, and I’ve noticed a significant change in my mobility. I walk every day but sometimes, with the shit winter we’ve had, going outside for a stroll doesn’t have a means to a fitness end since I’m not a runner.
I tried a set that concentrated on the lower half, focusing on quads and glutes. I feel these parts of me won’t improve but become enhanced since I have layers of ass and thighs, for which I have to thank genetics. My torso is the asshole in this case and always has been. I’ve spent enough time on my back for other reasons and now need to focus on my abs.
This Mom FUPA is an eyesore, and I’m not down wearing those tummy trainers that do nothing but make you look good and not feel good since they’re so damn uncomfortable.
The sun will rise again tomorrow, and I will still be me, in size 14.
At least I’m walking again!
Day 37
Rest day.
I went on a small outing through the shifting hills of my urban landscape for 20 gallons of water and hard seltzer. My body feels looser than the previous week, and that I am thankful for.
Tomorrow will begin the regular broadcasting schedule.
Day 38
I am without warmth.
Today I awoke to 31 degrees outside. It’s a temperature I’ve grown accustomed to, below freezing and above a thaw. Now I want warmth. I’ll take the wintery mix when it’s all in good fun to ski in, or be it a reason to stay inside and not have to fucking walk through it, shovel it, or melt it with fire. Get rid of the heavy coats, the layers, weighted boots, hats, gloves, and nonplus numbness.
I want trees, bugs, birds, sun. Infinite sun. I want to burn in it. I want it to melt my essence down to the soft center that no one knows but me.
There’s something about burpees that put me in a shitty mood. In actuality, outside elements put me in a shitty mood. Exercise is just an excuse not to die in the cold.
Day 39
8×8 weights were the special of the day today. I’ve been using dumbells, which are great to use, but I swapped them for my barbell with less than 10lbs on each side to get used to the movement and the weight. I’ve lifted and squatted with up to two 30lb dumbells and a 40lb weighted vest.
Right now, I can’t even stand up without saving my damn knee. I’m taking it easy on it. Lunges are stupid, and whoever invented them was stupid. On the other hand, Squats are excellent for non-stop top, and I can’t see how that’d be a credit to me. I’m not trying to reduce my ass mass but my butt is turning into a couple of glutie cuties.
I haven’t had any complaints.
Day 40
In the span of 4 hours, it felt like a long day. I loafed around, mostly. Walked a mile or two to muddle over things and then got to the nitty gritty of jabs and elbows that make the phantoms I pretend fighting wish they didn’t fuck around and find out.
Also, while I was running in place, I began to hear a round of applause. Shocked, I grabbed my ass cheeks to see if that was doing that. It was. I don’t know what the hell that means. But in true internet fashion, I saw a video of a girl doing the same but on purpose by happenstance.
I honestly do not know what to make of this. I’m gonna google it.
Day 41
Rest day.
Keeping my body busy is the song of the day. Hints of Spring are showing, and this house is a fucking mess. Small spaces when they get dirty is a nightmare, but I have to be thankful for the absence of vermin, of the non-humankind anyway.
So with that, I will be doing some exercise with squats, lifting, and kinetic movements to the screams in my head. I get an exceptional amount of work done in my time to myself. In truth, I’d rather be writing.
Day 42
Not as active as I wanted it to be, but I made it up with some reps and sets as a seasoning to the recovery my body needed.
Yesterday, I purchased yet another bathing suit to not wear in the presence of the father of my children or my children in public. My midsection can be compared to the fullness of a tick about to burst. Surprisingly I am not stressed about it in the least, and I know exactly what I need to do.
In the meantime, here’s a preview of the upper half.
Day 43
The feelings of intensified procrastination due to a minor lack of motivation and illusory arrangements of attention made toward less important moments to more important ones, I deeply want what I am doing to continue. It’s all taken in small steps that I am proud to accept.
Last night I started grabbing the loose skin on my abdomen, legs, hips, butt, where ever else I could pinch, in shock that all of this needs to be tight. I was tight once.
Now I’m just motherfuckin’ tiz-ight.
Day 44
Rest Day.
Was it? Really?
I decided to go shopping with a wagon I purchased to get my youngest from school to home in snowy and rainy weather because he would drag ass. It’s been used for a number of other tasks, and it has been excellent.
Until today. I must have had over 150 pounds in it. This amount of weight would be pulling air on an ordinary street, but where I live; It’s an obstacle course built for an Olympian.
I pulled that shit up at least four fucking hills until the front wheel gave out and the back rubbers detached from the rims. I was two blocks away from home, where I had to call for a ride.
I was thoroughly entertained with my music to drown out the screaming my body was doing. I’ll hear it tonight though.
Day 45
While I am still reeling from yesterday’s events, the below-par attempts at calisthenics did ease whatever pains that I would have felt today if I had done nothing at all. I’m not entirely in the mood to perform kickboxing routines to break the shell of heat that’s gathered around my muscles. I will do an ensemble of core and ab work, along with other hip and hamstring stretches.
Tomorrow is another day to face the bullshit that lies ahead! Once more, with less pain.
Day 46
My body is in the right amount of pain I can handle to begin my routine again. The ab exercises I did yesterday are what I feel the most from the journey I had on my rest day—all the more reason to push harder and longer, but safely.
Listening to music while exorcising is more of a challenge than ever nowadays. Need to Know by Doja Cat came on in a randomly generated playlist in “My Soundtrack.” Her music is basically stripper-core, and I was there for it. It isn’t easy to keep count of reps and sets when you keep thinking about being pounded. I’ll stick to 80s music where the wanting to fuck someone is solicited politely.
“I don’t play with my pen (pen), I mean what I write” is the only most genuine lyric from that whole fucking song.
Anyway, back to the pain of trying not to look like Jabba the Hut.
Day 47
It was a great workout day, in my honest opinion.
The morning started with a coffee chill session with mom friends where we talked about dicks and eating out guys’ bootyholes. I almost didn’t go because all I wanted to do was a workout, but I’m glad I went to not be in my head for a change.
I focused on weights involving squats, lunges, and minor core work. This is the only time I have no problem being on my back. Even though crunches and situps are not my favorites, they target the midsection just right. Belly fat sucks; it just fucking sucks.
I’ll get there way before you do.
Day 48
Cold and busy as all fuck rest day.
We have it under control. This break gives me time to think clearer and decide how to go further. My biggest issue is fat. Not that I think it’s terrible to have, but it conceals what I want to be showing. Then again, why do I need you to know that I can probably beat you in arm wrestling? I’m not here for that, though, so you’re safe.
All good things in time.
(Funny side note, I couldn’t remember arm-wrestling. These are the names that popped into my head; “Hand Wars” and “Wrist Push”)
Day 49
Today I began Liift 4, a program based on progression with weights and HIIT, making this an overall body routine that I have done in the past. I fucked around and stopped when I shouldn’t have to make this reintroduction a hard one.
The chest and triceps were the main focus, and a quick HIIT to get parts burning that the weights didn’t cover. I did everything with 10 pounds, and it was not easy, and I know that’s an improvement because I remember beginning with 5 pounds with skull crushers and the tricep presses.
My eye gaze was glassy, and I was in the zone. That’s where I am now.
Day one of week one of this eight-week program is completed twice and ends before my annual doctor’s visit. She gon be shook!
Day 50
Back and biceps were the ticket today to significant gains. I stuck to the 10-pound weights to keep them consistent with the movements. It’s perfectly okay to change up the weights if you’re not feeling anything, but 10s felt just fine. I have adjustable, but they’re a pain. I have to do the math! Ugh!
Afterward, I combined shoulder and hip stretch to make something out of the HIIT-less movements from this circuit. I had to power through all of it with my head being wholly fucked with allergies.
Not fun, but I did it. Day two of week one is done. Two more days to go.
Day 51
Rest and recovery today.
I have a cold now, which leveled up from an allergy. Not the best head on these shoulders today, but I will perform active stretches to loosen my limbs.
More gains tomorrow!
Day 52
Shoulders. Oh, my fucking glob. Shoulders.
This is part of the routine I don’t like. Shoulders contain tiny muscles, and different movements define each. I can recall when I first began that I could lift four-pound weights for the front, lateral, and Y raises because they can be challenging if you don’t use your shoulders for anything other than shrugging. Today, I completed most of the moves using ten-pound weights, and I felt it. In the very last action, I had to scale down to using four pounds to keep my form.
My head was only half in the game, sadly. With my nose stuffed and constant sneezing, I was determined to get this done. Day three of week one is over, on to the next.
Day 53
Week one of eight is done, and the return of weights is a huge help in what I want to get under control. I have so much more to go.
The days ahead will become tons more complicated with calculating the exact weights I will use to make progress. I have weight plates that are sometimes a pain to keep up with, and all I see ahead are the gains I’m going to be making.
Pictures of what 50+ days of nonstop exercising have resulted in will be posted soon. I’m looking forward to the next seven weeks.
What follows won’t be for the faint of heart.
Day 54
This rest day, I, well, rested. Concentrating on stretching my hips is the main focus and my core to shed parts of my FUPA away. Its day is coming!
Day 55
Today was the first fantastic day, and all of it was spent out in the sun and taking my kids to the park.
I also did some ankle extensions not to be a dick to my squats.
Day 56
Week two began, and I added 2 pounds more to last week’s sets to see if the challenge could be had. To my chagrin, it fucking was, and I fucking killed it with a circuit combined set of triceps and chest exercises. It left me staring into space, questioning my existence, and that’s when I knew it was a good workout.
Day one of week two logged on to the next!
Day 57
Powering through back and biceps with 12-pound weights was more complicated than I thought for some movements. The intensity set the tone for the day and also has me elated that I can rest tomorrow from lifting. Although whatever I need to get done will have me lifting shit one way or another.
As the warmer weather approaches, the need to be outside is getting to its point. New York weather has become frighteningly bipolar, and the environment and access to outdoor activities for kids to enjoy. I’m on the verge of getting on a plane with my boys and taking them on vacation. If I think about it hard enough, it will happen. Sooner than later.
Day 58
I am resting today while actively stretching what I have sore from yesterday.
I wasn’t in the greatest of moods yesterday, I had so much energy to do several things, but I had to postpone them to entertain. My display of unhappiness clearly shows because of this fucking heart on my sleeve.
Another day. Nothing’s changed.
Day 59
I did not want to do shoulders today.
I’m still feeling back and biceps from Sunday, and damn. No pain, just soreness from massaging the areas enough.
The days are getting longer and more encouraging to walk longer distances for overall fitness. The sights around here are bland and set no real challenges, and the time out is what I mostly look forward to.
Left. Right. Left. Right.
Day 60
Week two is done, ending with legs HIIT that I feel excellent about.
Two days are ahead for resting, and I wish I could get the relaxing bodywork that I genuinely need. A few years ago, I tried those salt floating baths, and it was an odd but very relaxing experience. The cost was worth it but too much to make a steady habit—all good things in time.
My abdominals need some well-deserved attention. Time to get up on it!
Day 61
Rest along with 20 or minutes of core and hip stretches is what is in store for today.
I remember these rest days and not doing anything to keep the process going along because of the lack of motivation I’d have. I still don’t have much drive but just like the illusion of intimacy, I keep telling myself that it’s all going to get better.
It’s all a matter of the mind. As much as I get out of it or explore its caves, I’m not going to have a good time.
Day 62
Tomorrow begins Week Three of LIIFT 4!
Today was the last day of rest, and it was spent stretching and constant movements to get loose for the routines to come.
I look forward to seeing some improvement, and I’ll finally get to wear less and be okay with it. Get an even tan, for once!
Day 63
Hit up the chest and triceps with HIIT at the end to start Week 3 like a sonofabitch. I went up to 15 pounds on what was offered and held back on one because it was still harder than hell to power through.
I started back on the bike because my thick thighs wouldn’t save themselves. I am already feeling the results of what I’m putting in. Damn, it hurts so good.
Day 64
LIIFT4 put my back and biceps to the test, and I passed by upping my weights for movements that could take the weight.
I’m beginning to see some changes, but it is still too soon to tell. It seems to stay the same when I take my weight and redistributes the mass to other places other than out of my ass.
Whatever-all you do is get to look and not touch.
Day 65
Perfect day to rest on such a cold as all fuck day in March today.
I almost wanted to stay in bed and give my kids an extended weekend. Then I remembered I am not a lazy bitch and walked their bundled up behinds to school.
I want to start wearing my weighted vest in the morning while walking them to school and progressively work my way to going longer distances. It’s forty pounds, and I think a few times a week is a good start. I am now working on these thick thighs to save a life in the future.
I spent the morning rolling out my muscles and stretching my back to prepare for my shoulders and legs that will wrap up this third week of weights.
I can’t weight!
Day 66
Completed day three of four in Week three of LIIFT 4.
I saw an opportunity to increase my weight and I took it. I went all out on the shoulder press and almost passed out from the pleasure of how well I did. A new movement called “swimmers” was added and it was HARD.
More than thirty minutes was contributed to the bike to bring my pain and gain to a perfect end to an afternoon. Later on, the usual mobility stretches to become next year’s limbo champion.
One more day for Week three and it’s the halfway point of my first round of weightlifting.
Day 67
I’ve got legs, and I know how to use them!
Holy shit! Today was a loaded workout involving only legs and 20-pound weights to make it a day not worth skipping. I knew I could have increased on a few movements, but my grip strength needs improving, just for some parts to get further ahead.
Week three is over. After two days of rest and recovery, Week four greets me to begin the work from the beginning, increasing my weight. All of this in Thirty to Forty minutes a day; who would have thunk it?
Day 68
First rest day where I attempted actual rest.
I did a few abdominal and additional leg work that gave me a slight ache in my knee, but I got it all stretched out, and it’s all better now. I am now at the point where I need to burn fat more than ever, but I’m taking my time about it. I have to ease my way again into using the bike for long periods. The issue is my ass and how sore it is after a few days. It passes but not something I look forward to again.
One more day of so-called rest.
Day 69
Worked the hell out of my legs today with a grocery run. I had to re-up on five 1-gallon jugs of water to get me used to inhaling that amount each day. It wasn’t easy for the first few days, but I feel the difference in my overall activity.
Later this afternoon, I will get some more steps in on my mini stepper. It comes in handy when I don’t want or can’t go on the bike, and I sweat my ass off just the same on this little thing.
Tomorrow begins Week Four of LIIFT 4, and I’m looking forward to upping my weight!
Day 70
Week four started with increased weight for my chest and triceps!
Everything is as sore as it should be after this circuit workout. I don’t want to think of a push-up anymore, and I’ll call it later when I stop hating them. Honestly, I do need more work in that area. Lifting weights and other exercises help, but it’s not something I’ve ever concentrated on.
The weight increase on the skull crushers made me reflect on all the negative things in my life that have led me to weak fucking triceps. If I had planned, I could have done more on my chest. The following weeks will get me the good gains I need to go heavier.
Getting more time in on my core is beginning to show.
Now that’s what I call progress!
Day one of week four is done. On to the next!
Day 71
Back and biceps did not come to fuck around today.
For the tradition and wide rows, I used my long bar and all the weighted plates I had to make it 36-pounds. It was a good lift. I will have to get creative in the future on increasing the weight if I need. Or break down and, ugh, join a gym. I even did one set of full curls with the bar, and holy shit, it woke me up. I stayed with the previous week’s weight for the other movements to have me able to complete all of them. The remainder burnout was squats, wide mountain climbers, and lunges.
My hamstring, out of nowhere, became tighter than a motherfucker a few days ago. It comes and goes but isn’t too much of a nuisance.
Week four of day two is done; tomorrow’s rest won’t make any difference to the pain I’ll be in. I’ll smile through it, as I always do.
Day 72
Resting today will be taken seriously to the fullest extent of the action
I took a few hours off from my usual rest day routine and casually walked around, albeit shopping, but I didn’t feel like I needed to haul ass to get myself busy with another task.
I can see that I can improve the activities I can perform; I wish I could say the same for my diet. At this point, I need to be catered to. I won’t add a sensible meal prep system into my life unless everyone in the household adopts it. Healthy eating choices are a choice. Sometimes you can’t make that choice for a child who is already a picky eater, even more so for an adult that’s a picky eater.
I drink my fruits and veggies because the literal servings you need daily are unfair to someone whose basic form of absorbing nutrition is daydreaming about food.
This issue will be addressed when needed. Until then, I got some fat to burn around my abs and legs. Don’t get the gimp yet.
Day 73
I have got the hottest shoulders right now.
The workout overall was fantastic, and it was something I was looking forward to after the rest from yesterday. In some parts, the weight was increased, and I feel it. You know when you have to work on your shoulders more when you do swimmers with the lowest weight and can barely lift your arms or shrug your shoulders afterward.
Stretching is still tantamount to improving my mobility. As of late, I have been crazy tight. If it’s from not moving enough or poor massaging, I’m guilty of not feeling myself up more. Any volunteers?
Day 74
I hate to see legs leave, but I like to watch them walk away.
At the end of the week, the work block was legs without weight. This type of work leaves room for improvement. To gain mastery of body awareness to get the best results in the areas you’re putting the work into. Soccer run, triple bears, pulsing sumo squats, and lunges are just the beginning. I get pulled over for this ass being too fat but more needs to be done.
Week four is over! Week five through eight will be the past four weeks, but all of my weights will be upped to attain significant gains. I’m not going to like it. I’m going to love it.
Day 75
I took a rest today from the heavy lifting, but I took the time to do some core and leg exercises to practice mobility.
Bulgarian split squats entered the chat and wouldn’t stop. I admittedly struggled, but I will keep up with it. I know that 75 days ago, I probably couldn’t get into that particular position without hurting myself somehow.
A few a day will get me on the right track.
Day 76
Last rest day before I begin week five of LIIFT 4. Today was spent focusing on massaging out any tension I may have had. And I have tons of it all over my damn body. It’s now evident that I need to do dynamic stretching each day to not feel like I’m stiffening up.
Working out my legs and core more between or after performing weights has become a routine. Responsibilities shorten the attention I want to give to them entirely, but I don’t live in James Bond world where I would jump across rooftops or climb a mountain to pick up my kids from school.
Day 77
Week five! I’ve been here a handful of times before, but I am paying attention during this period of my life.
It was chest and triceps with six out of the eight moves, all performed with increased weight. After procrastination about it for 2 hours, I got down to business. The workout was just what you’d expect when attempting to perform ten repetitions of skull crushers with 18-pound weights. Yet I still think my triceps are not where they should be. I’ll work on it.
Once I completed that, I did two sets and 12 reps of quad and glute moves. That category needs to be rotated regularly, and you can’t be a one-trick pony.
Never let them know my next move.
Day 78
I showed my back and biceps no mercy today with a significant increase in weight for my wide and traditional rows with the giant plates in my possession, two 25lbs that I felt every pound of them. I think I’ll stick to this type of weight for my back and legs for now.
I will fill tomorrow’s rest day with the proper rest to prepare for my shoulders and legs, both with increased weight!
Day 79
I finally did it. I rested today.
Some matters at hand that needed to be addressed didn’t involve squeezing my glutes.
I did a set of core exercises to get those abs to work. The past few weeks have also been the early stages of my consumption of a gallon of water a day, regretting my missing out on the opportunity to fill the void of a purveyor of showers of the gold. I could have made bank.
Tomorrow is shoulders. Week five is almost over. Ohmaigah, I can’t wait.
Day 80
My shoulders sure did get a workout today with a handful of movements performed with an increased weight that I will most definitely feel tomorrow morning.
Today was a delightful and pleasant day outside, so the park was part of the action at the end of the day. Before that, I performed three sets of glute and quadriceps weighted movements that just kept the sweat pouring down from my shoulders routine.
Tomorrow is the last day of Week five; my legs will get another round of pain!
Day 81
Three more weeks to go in LIIFT 4!
Today was legs with varied weights that all pumped out so much sweat that I know I didn’t skate through any part of the routine.
The entire days I’ve been active have been Eighty-one days, but I’ve only been doing LIIFT 4 for Thirty-three days. Along with the nutrition and supplements regimen that I’ve adopted, I’ve seen an improvement in many areas. Not a complete 180-degree shift, but enough to notice from my point of view.
Two days of well-needed rest and recovery from all the serious weight I’ve lifted in the previous days is in order.
In that time, I’d love to go on a small hike. With this weather breaking into something more tolerable than above freezing, I’m due for a very long walk.
Day 82
I rested today better than most; I spent time outside as I fully intended.
I also spent time sorting tasks and finalizing decisions on the path to something tangible than a weighted squat fat ass.
Day 83
Today is the beginning of spring break and my last rest day before beginning Week six in LIIFT 4. Time was wisely spent with various weighted and weightless movements and then walking to the park with my boys.
As of late, it has become difficult to figure out what’s good to eat to help in my efforts. I have tons of fruits and wholegrain this and that, and I’ll get that straightened out at some point.
Day 84
Week six of LIIFT four started with a heavy fucking start. I pushed everything I could with my chest and triceps with quad sets in this circuit-style run during the first day.
Nothing much else was done afterward but a few lunges and squats to save face, but the beginning of spring break always tends to have me leave some things on the floor.
I’ve got some cleaning up to do.
Day 85
Day two of week six is done, and my back and biceps will be feeling it tomorrow during the days’ rest.
I went wild and upped my row weight from 62 pounds to 82 pounds on my weight bar. It was as hard as it sounds, but I completed three sets with HIIT at the end to make it all worth the work. It was an opportunity to make my back muscles do the job today, and they sure fucking did!
The rest tomorrow won’t be much of one. It’s the preshow to my youngest turning 6, and in those 24 little hours, I am always a wreck.
The only heavyweight I want on my shoulders are the bells I will be lifting the day after next!
Day 86
Resting today consisted of sitting on the passenger side of the road to spend time outside of the house with my family. Sadly, something unknown resulted in a terrible headache. I am guilty of never aiding a headache with any form of aspirin, and I’d stay having one last to upwards of a week not to take any damn drugs.
Can you guess what I did next?
Stay tuned for shoulders on day three of week six!
Day 87
Did you guess?
I didn’t take any aspirin and spent the entire night tossing and turning, unable to sleep because of a pounding headache. Knowing it wouldn’t kick in as fast as I would have liked it to, I proceeded to lift weights. The result had me wishing that the pain I was experiencing would magically make me telekinetic because I felt like I was being fucking scanned by Micheal Ironside.
A majority was completed with exertion and a precise question of my sanity. A few hours later, I was to be a part of an expedition to celebrate the spirit journey formation anniversary of my second in command of my heart.
Tomorrow will be the end of week six and the last time I use my legs as I know it.
Day 88
Full HIIT of legs is what wrapped up week six of LIIFT 4.
But instead of doing the curated workout, I decided to make some moves on my own. I had a workout all the same, and I’ve been able to find better hip and knee mobility movements that have improved my squats much more. I need to break out my jump rope and get this ass working itself in midair. It’s getting warmer out, and it might be happening soon!
I have two days of rest before week seven begins. Lots of this and that, until then!
Day 89
No rest was given to this wicked child today.
I spent the day performing multiple sets of hip rotations and getting back on track with learning the aspects of psychology, once again, to improve my life and relationships and writing. All beginnings are complicated, and I took the jump.
Another day of rest to follow until I feel the weight of it all again.
Day 90
It was a sunny and windy as all fuck on my rest day before I begin week seven of LIIFT 4 tomorrow.
To keep spritely, I did some hip and quadricep routines after spending some time in the sun. All are doing well now and will be better in time.
I am pushing onward to Week Seven!
Day 91
Week seven has begun and with a twist!
The procedure previously had the user perform movements that followed each other, such as combing chest and triceps one day and then back and biceps another. This new combination had the user do chest and back exercises circuit style.
That was some shit. All of which I increased my weight. I wanted to end the day doing some types of leg exercises but opted to do 30 minutes on the bike. I miss doing it and hope to do that a lot more.
As the 100th day approaches, I have seen some significant differences. The one thing I have the biggest issue with is my weight; it’s barely gone down. Okay, a pound or two, but that’s normal. At this point, I am glad that I hadn’t gained any more weight than when I started.
All of a sudden, I’m in a big hurry. I’ve got nowhere to be, and I’m just here. I’m not going anywhere.
Day 92
Day two of week seven got my legs shaking with EIGHT different weighted movements that I still feel hours later. It was a great conclusion to my needed day of rest tomorrow.
The time I take exercising, mainly stretching, I take that time to my advantage and listen to my courses while I work on my mobility and zone out while sitting cross-legged on the floor. This was a difficult transition because I would need to physically sit down and follow the lectures with my notes to get my footing. After some practice, I’m relieved I can now do this (continue to exercise) and that since it saves time.
Week seven is almost complete, and it’s only going to get more complicated. It’s supposed to be!
Day 93
Today I took a very long walk after taking the kids back to school after Spring Break. With yesterday’s leg routine still with me, more recovery will be made tonight to prepare for arms tomorrow.
It’s exciting that the end is finally coming to this challenge that I have progressed on multiple times now and in the past. Now, not only do I want to lift, but I also want to make progress on my flexibility and mobility in general.
I feel like I’ll also go back to doing MMA exercises. But that doesn’t leave any room for anything other than that. I’ve gotten used to the three rest days given in LIIFT 4, and core de Force only has one rest day and doesn’t give you the complete physical rest you really would need.
It’s all an option for now. I’m so used to these challenges that I completely ignore the fact that I have Onnit and Pierce Power programs that I’ve barely used to my advantage in fulfilling the motion my body wants to flow.
Gettin’ up on that!
Day 94
Week six brought only arms to the party, and it was a basher. Since it’s nearing the end, the routines are mixed to purposely trick your muscles into doing more work or less work; whatever, I’m fucking feeling it.
Tomorrow will conclude the week with a full-body HIIT that, if I remember correctly, isn’t as bad as it’s perceived to be.
I’ll find out then!
Day 95
It’s almost the end of LIIFT 4; week six is done with full-body HIIT, and it wasn’t as intense as I remembered, but droplets of substance that smelled like sweat excreted from my pores.
It was a great end to six weeks of progressive weight training. I speak as if with the final week approaching that, that’s that with my relationship with LIIFT 4 and all it stands for. Maybe. Maybe not. It has helped me so much, and I see the differences here and there.
Two days of rest until it all ends.
Day 96
Rest is an understatement when you’re a creature of habitual multitasking.
At my current age, my being able to exclude the outside world’s distractions has had numerous visits to the research and development department regarding comfort and maximum sound tunneling directly into my ears, not to hear the satanic babbles that resonate from my seeds constantly.
I’ve invested in so many in-ear, over-ear devices that my hearing has taken a beating from the beats I love listening to. I recently discovered open speakers, a wrap-around device that rests just outside the ear to send the sound directly over the ear bone. Think of those Bose sunglasses with built-in speakers. Since I already wear glasses, I needed something a step down from that, and I found Bluetooth audio speakers that I can clip to my glasses frames to listen to my lectures as I walk and still hear everything around me.
This encourages me to walk even more, and I can’t wait for this Northeastern weather to break into something manageable.
Thankfully today and tomorrow promote movement of some kind.
Day 97
I’m sitting in my living room, typing at my laptop when in all honesty, I don’t feel like doing anything productive. Today is Friday; I ain’t got no job; I ain’t got shit to do.
That’s a lie. I do have shit to do. Resting is one of them, and I’m sitting here trying to figure out how to relax and get gains simultaneously. It’s bonkers.
In three days, the finale of LIIFT 4 could either mean I will continue to lift weights and listen to Joel or try Onnit, where I’ll use my body weight (and there is much weight to use) to find a flow that works for or against me.
Consistency is vital, and some time on the bike will set things straight for me. Rest will come when the day is done.
Day 98
Week eight has all led up to this!
Even though I have mentioned that this isn’t my first time with the LIIFT 4 challenge, the activity is challenging to perform, and finding the time to do it has its obstacles.
Chest and back was today’s routine, and it was hard as all fuck. The sweat that screamed from my pores was proof I was making moves to a better (looking) me. There is much further to go.
Day 99
I got the shock of my life when I realized today was legs.
I wasn’t ready, but I went in on it with full force and blasted through 240 weighted repetitions, questioning the many choices I’ve made in life that prevented me from shaping my thick thighs into titanium weapons of mass destruction.
Taking a moment for a stroll in the park helped me gather my thoughts for the future of this exorcising journey. I purposely haven’t matched my movements with my food intake, and all of that is about to change.
Tomorrow will be the first 100 DAYS! The following 100 will not be for the faint of heart.
Day 100
On the 100th day of exorcising, rest is my centennial gift to myself.
That is not entirely true.
Shopping was my gift to myself and my family because it needed to be done at the beginning of the month. It is also the first time I will be prepping meals ahead of time for my physical fitness. I was stuck in a loop of drinking only 3 liters of water and salad whenever I felt hungry.
I kicked that habit and adopted a routine that I hope will help me set things straight and lose the weight I so desperately need to.Exorcising Demons With ID
Day three of week eight is all arms, and I can’t wait for it!